A few nights ago, I walked out of my house with a dog and a heavy burden. My day had begun with 4:45 am wake ups and ended with feelings of exhausted failure. As my faithful dog and I plodded through the streets of my neighborhood, all I could think of was what I did wrong—what I could have done better—where I failed and where I didn’t do my best.
Then I looked at the beautiful clouds in front of me and realized: those thoughts are not from Him.
God doesn’t love me because I am a good parent.
He loves me because I am His.
In fact, God wouldn’t love me any less if I was a horrible parent. Even if I was a deliberately neglectful or unashamedly self-centered parent, He would still love me the same. His love for me is not based on my performance or goodness, but on His.
Parenting feels really important and IS really important, but it’s not all there is to me, and it’s not all up to me. At the end of the day, He holds my kids and He holds me. Nothing I do (good or bad) is as important as what He has already done. And anything good I have done is Him, anyway.
The Holy Spirit is here to help me and encourage me, to coach and guide me and give me wisdom—not to burden me with shame and not to make me walk around with a pile of guilt weighing me down.
The Lord gives lightness. Purpose. Direction. Wisdom. Insight. Energy. Grace. Love. Rest. Yes, He convicts—but always through the stream of those other things. Anything else isn’t Him.
I just wanted to share these reminders with anyone who may need them. And remind me too, ok?