In Part I of this (very short) series, I shared how the end of 2013 went. Now, I want to share my overall impression of 2013.
Every year I find that there is a central theme to the things God has taught me, and that theme can almost always be summed up in one word.
This year’s word?
I remember hearing a song lyric a few years ago:
When I get where I’m going
There’ll be only happy tears
I will shed the sins and struggles
I have carried all these years
And I’ll leave my heart wide open
I will love and have no fear
It’s talking about Heaven and at the time I heard this song, I thought yes, that’s when I will be free…in Heaven.
But this year, I got to experience some of this freedom here on earth. I rang in the new year happily eating cake with David. If you had known me a few years ago, this would have been unfathomable. Sins and struggles…shed.
This year, I walked away from a job that I used to define myself by. This year, I wrote my heart and shared it with people I knew. And this year, I admitted to myself and to a few people that I love that I want to spend more time and dedicate more energy to writing in the upcoming year because I feel like I am being the full me—the person that God created me to be—when I write. Me, letting myself do something without a guaranteed outcome. Heart…wide open.
This year, I did my best to love well and to live with open hands and in the process, I saw and felt how perfect love drives out fear. I’m in a totally crazy situation right now and yet my heart is expectant and trusting, not fearful.
I love the image above of David throwing Zoe because he’s releasing her, letting her be free, but not letting her fall. She’s at peace because she knows he will catch her. She’s at peace because she knows he knows what he’s doing.
The joy on her face is what I’ve felt this year.
Emily Freeman writes, “your ability to bring glory to God by simply being the person you fully are and embracing the job you’ve been given to do is a uniquely human privilege…Christ is in you and he wants to come out through you in a way he won’t come out through anyone else.”
This was the year I finally understood that. This was the year I finally stepped aside and said okay. I won’t keep trying to be the person I want to be…I’ll be the person I am. The person you created me to be. The person you delight in.
It was my year of freedom.
My next post (the final in this series) will detail my 2014 goals…written in the spirit of freedom, of course!
What word described your year?